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My Contribution to the World of Search Engine Optimization Blogging
Note: This blog posting deals with the world of Search Engine Optimization (SEO). If you're here for my latest music post, go here. If you're here for my latest recipe, click here.
Those pesky paginations: extensions of your home page, archive pages, and other pages that tend to gather a lot of posts and entries over time. I usually refer to paginations as “page 2’s”, because they start with page 2, 3, etc. They usually look like this:“www.website.com/page/2”, and they can get numerous, if you publish a lot of content. I found out the hard way that it’s possible to incur algorithmic penalties on Google, etc., if your “page 2’s” contain a lot of thin or duplicate content. To address this, you either have to go and optimize the content on each individual page (which can range in the thousands), delete a whole bunch of links, posts, etc. If you don’t have a few extra hundred hours in your day to do that, then there are 2 other options:
1. Set the paginations to “noindex” either with an .htaccess code or plugin; or
2. Add a few lines of code to your robots.txt file to “Disallow” search engines from crawling paginations. For example: Disallow: /page/*
Now, there are a few instances in which you shouldn’t de-index or disallow paginations. For example, if the only place to find a popular article on your blog is to find it all the way on page 1124 on the home page, you might inadvertently get that article de-indexed from Google. This reason is precisely why sitemaps are important. If you have to disallow or “noindex” your paginations, you need to make sure that all of your most relevant content on Google can be found in a sitemap. This is why I use at least 2 different kinds of sitemaps: one for pages, posts, and categories, and one for video content.
Honestly, the best way to determine whether or not you should allow indexing of your paginations is to check your site coverage in Google Search Console, and compare the changes in coverage with your rise/fall in your Google rankings. If your rankings go down every time Google indexes more “page 2’s”, etc., then you should probably consider de-indexing or disallowing the paginations.
To learn more about de-indexing paginations in .htaccess, check out the following article:
Chorus: You're turning heads up and down the street every time when you Strut Your Stuff.
Everybody has their eyes on you when you strut your stuff.
Verse 2:
You don't play
Legs for days
I could get lost in your eyes
I love your walk
The way you talk
You got your pick of any guy
Bridge: All of the boys want to see ya
All of the girls want to be ya
Oh my oh my, can't refuse ya
When you walk by, I just lose my mind
Chorus: You're turning heads up and down the streets every time when you Strut Your Stuff.
Everybody has their eyes on you when you strut your stuff.
Traffic stopping as you walk down the street 'cause you strut your stuff.
You're the center of the universe 'cause you strut your stuff.
Everybody wants to love you now 'cause you strut your stuff.
You don't have to settle anyhow 'cause you strut your stuff.
The Backstory
Back in 2014, I was contracted to compose a work-for-hire song, to be submitted to an advertisement company for use in a TV commercial. They wanted a song with an electronica hard rock sound to it. Well, I could handle the hard rock part, but I had to cheat a little bit on the electronica element to it. I basically ended up writing a Van Halen song with synths and loops in it, and I don't feel the slightest bit guilty for doing it. It turned out to be one of the best songs I'd ever written, produced, and recorded. Too bad I sold the rights to it, away. I hope it found a good home, somewhere......😪😢
The Production Stuff
I recorded, sequenced, produced, mixed, and mastered this song entirely in Logic Pro X. The drums have been programmed using Logic's excellent drum kit samples. Rather than programming all the drums on one MIDI track, I always record each individual drum or percussion part on individual tracks, so that I can control the mix and effects on each one. For the snare drum, I came up with an EQ and reverb chain that very closely mimicked Alex Van Halen's snare drum sound from Van Halen's "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge" album in 1991. For the kick drum, I recorded 2 separate tracks featuring an acoustic kick drum sample, plus an electronic kick drum programmed to emulate a 1984-era Simmons kick drum, like the kit Alex used on Van Halen's "1984". I played all the guitar parts live using my EVH "Wolfgang" guitar, tuned down 1/2 step, with the D-tuna on the low E string pulled out into the low D (D-flat, actually) position. I played that through a tube mic pre-amp into a USB audio interface, with an IK Multimedia Amplitube 2 amp simulator plug-in, with my own custom EVH-inspired amp sound dialed in. I recorded the vocals using a CAD Trion 6000 condenser mic. The bass and synths were programmed using one of Logic Pro's stock synth plugins, the one that emulates an old-style ARP polyphonic synthesizer. I used that plugin to dial in a sound close to the synth sound Edward Van Halen used on "Jump". To make the song sound more electronic-y, I threw in some stock Apple Loops, hoping the buyer wouldn't notice. They didn't.....😆
I still have some very fond memories composing and producing this song. I hope all of you enjoy......
I wrote this song in the spring of 2007. Lyrically, it's pretty much what you think it's about: a breakup......and yeah, we broke up......🙄
Musically, I wanted to write a song in the style of 1970's Chicago, complete with lots of 7th chords, strummy, Terry Kath-influenced rhythm guitars, and real horns......and the horns are indeed real.
I recorded this song using Magix Samplitude. The drums were programmed into Samplitude's sequencer, and I used their stock drum sampler as the sound bank. I also played and edited the keyboards using an electronic piano patch, that sounded like something between a Wurlitzer and a Rhodes. The bass was programmed using a synth bass sample. I didn't have a good-sounding bass guitar that was fit for recording, so I decided to program it, instead.
For the horns, I used a real, garden-variety cornet that I had borrowed, and a Conn student-line trombone. I wanted a really round, dark bold horn sound that resembled Jimmy Pankow and Lee Loughnane's trombone/flugelhorn combination on Chicago's "Just You & Me".
Speaking of Chicago, I got to meet original Chicago drummer Danny Seraphine twice, once in 2009, and once again in 2011. The second time, I asked him if he'd be interested in playing on this song. He told me he'd get back to me because he was in the middle of a move, and didn't have a drum kit at his new place, yet. We never got back with each other on the project. I probably wouldn't be able to afford him now, but I think he'd sound awesome on this track.
I remember sharing the video to this song in a Chicago-related forum a long time ago. I got some positive feedback from a few fans. One in particular thought the vocals sounded like a cross between Peter Cetera and David Pack (of Ambrosia fame). When I went back and listened to the tune and compared it to an Ambrosia tune, I realized he was right. I wasn't even trying to sound like David Pack, but I managed to get a close approximation, I think.
I never really finished this song, by the way. There was supposed to be an instrumental bridge after the 2nd chorus featuring a bright horn line in the key of G major, then leading back to final verse, chorus, and ending, but I never got around to recording it. If I ever do re-record this song, I will most definitely include that version.
This song was never released as a single, but you can find it on YouTube. I've had it there since about 2010.
Am I supposed to come out with my feelings about you?
Oh, why can’t I accept that we aren’t to be?
And how can I go on each day without you by me?
The Backstory
This song started as a project for a graduate class I was taking in 2017. I was supposed to generate a piece of original artwork and write about how it relates to the course content. The class I was taking was meant for visual art majors, but I was a music production major, so I had to make sure it was okay with my instructor to write and produce a song for the assignment. She enthusiastically approved my request, so I went to work, starting out with writing a guitar chord progression, and recording it into Logic Pro X. Then I added a bass line, liked where the song was going, so I programmed some drum tracks. I'm really, really picky about using electronic percussion and drum samples, so I ended spending literally weeks on tweaking the drum samples, quantization, velocity, signal chain, EQ, and reverb to make the programming sound as human as possible. It was no big deal, because I tend to mix songs on the fly, anyway. Next, I added an electric guitar melody on top, along the lines of something Steve Vai, Joe Satriani, or Neal Schon of Journey might have played. Once I had a basic intro-verse-chorus-verse-chorus-ending structure, I bounced a rough mix of it and submitted it as my class project. My instructor was absolutely THRILLED by how it sounded, and subsequently, I got an A in the class. Ironically, I can't even remember the name of the class I was taking.....😆
Even though I was done with the class, I wasn't done with the song. The next thing I did was to add lyrics to the melody, and try to figure out how to approach the vocals. My first draft vocal take on the song was to sing it like Robert Lamm from early 1970's Chicago, but I ended up discarding that take, because I ended up sounding a little too MUCH like Lamm......way too much chest voice in the lower and middle registers. So I decided to approach the verses with a more delicate head voice to it, and I was concerned that I might have trouble hitting some of those mid-register notes in head voice, but I managed to pull it off. I ended up channeling 70's Gino Vannelli when I recorded the verses. The chorus, on the other hand, was always, ALWAYS meant to evoke a strong dynamic contrast to the verses. That section was done in in my upper register, and I HAD to use a strong chest voice to project the appropriate emotion and power the song needed. If the verse was Gino Vannelli, then the chorus was more Steve Walsh, a la 70's KANSAS.
The guitar solo took a while for me to finalize. I think I took longer on the solo than I did on the lead vocals. There was this lick I learned from late 70's/early 80's Neal Schon that I couldn't help but throw into the solo, and I ended up finishing the solo with a few Eddie Van Halen-esque quotes. If you're a fan of late 70's Van Halen, you might recognize what I'm talking about.
Oddly enough, the part of the song I spent the greatest amount of time working on were the background vocals. I think I spent the bulk of the summer of 2017 getting the harmonies right, not just with the phrasing and intonation, but with the right mix. There was this vocal music major I knew who was more than half my age that would message me every once in a while whenever she was panicking over a music theory assignment, and every once in a while, I would send her some rough mixes of just the vocal harmonies to get her input on them. I used her impressions to tweak the balance between the inner voices, and adjust the effects. She was my creative muse, and a source of inspiration. She still doesn't know about that, though.....
I ended up finishing the song on or around August 31, 2017. I initially released this song through ReverbNation in September 2017. It was originally on iTunes, Amazon Music, Spotify, and all the other usual chains, but it's currently no longer in print. I finally decided to re-release it on YouTube yesterday, so the video link above is the one place you're guaranteed to find it, just in case. I hope you enjoy......
The Lyrics, and What They're About
This song's lyrics are about something I have way more experience in than I care to admit: The Friend Zone. It's basically about having feelings for someone you're not really supposed to have feelings for, and pretending that you don't have them. Getting friend-zoned can happen for a variety of different reasons, but from my experience, it happens when both parties in a friendship are attracted to each other, but one of them isn't attracted enough to do anything about it. In the context of this song, she's actually the one who was interested in dating me, but I was having to keep her at arm's length, because I wasn't exactly available at the time. This is the exact reverse of pretty much every other time I had been previously thrust into the Friend Zone. Trust me when I tell you that having an attractive lady dangling her body in front of you like a carrot, and having to pretend you're not interested in having a bite was......not exactly pleasant. 😖
Back in 1983, I was attending 6th grade in a Catholic school, which I absolutely hated, but that’s not what we’re here to talk about. There was this song that girls used to sing that I hadn’t heard on the radio yet, but because of these loudmouth girls I was in class with, all I heard in my head for 3 months was “Don’t turn around, uh oh! Your pants are fallin’ down, uh oh!”. It drove me nuts. At the end of the school year, my mom came and got me and my sister, and we all moved to Louisiana, where I got to attend an actual normal public school again. Louisiana is where I got to experience MTV, Music Television for the first time. That’s where I got to see a proper presentation of After The Fire’s “Der Kommissar”, in which I finally got to hear the lyrics sung right” “Don’t turn around, uh oh! Der Kommissar’s in town, uh oh!”. Little did I know that within a month, I would find out that those weren’t actually the real lyrics…..
About a month after I heard After The Fire’s version of “Der Kommissar”, another video popped up on MTV, featuring a dude with his hair slicked back, singing a very familiar song with lyrics I couldn’t understand. My mom was in the room at the time, and she told me that this was the original song by the original guy, and that the lyrics were in German. The singer’s name was Falco. Once I heard Falco’s version of “Der Kommissar”, I could never enjoy After The Fire’s version quite the same way, again.
Skip ahead to the late 20-teens, and I’m just casually perusing through Wikipedia, which I’d been doing since about 2009-ish, or so, and I find out that there was a THIRD version of “Der Kommissar”, also released back in 1983, only this one wasn’t called that…..it was called “Deep in the Dark”! Funny how I had never heard that version, or seen the video, back in those days. Curious, I went to YouTube, found the video, put it on, and yes indeed, it WAS, in fact, another version of Falco’s song, with new lyrics completely unrelated to either Falco’s or After The Fire’s version.
History
“Der Kommissar” was originally written by a producer named Robert Ponger, and was intended for some dude named Reinhold Bilgeri, who I’m unfamiliar with. Reinhold, on the other hand, didn’t want to do the song, so Ponger submitted the song to Austrian singer Falco, who liked it, and decided to re-work the lyrics. As a result, Falco has been credited as co-author of the song.
Falco’s version was released on December 11, 1981, in German-speaking countries, initially. Eventually the song was released in the US, but it did not chart, initially. Regardless, the video of it did get picked up by fledgling TV network MTV, and they began playing the video in heavy rotation, where it finally gained an audience, and after Falco finally broke the US charts with “Rock Me Amadeus” in 1986, “Der Kommissar” finally reached the US Billboard Charts, peaking at #22 on the US Mainstream Rock charts.
In 1982, British New Wave group After The Fire recorded an English-language version of “Der Kommissar”. Unlike Falco’s, After The Fire’s version managed to chart on Billboard’s US Hot 100 chart, peaking at #5.
Later in 1982, that same year, American singer Laura Branigan, best known for the single “Gloria (I think they got your number)”, recorded yet another version, only with new lyrics, and the song was retitled as “Deep in the Dark”. Laura’s version was featured on her second album Branigan 2, and released as the album’s second single. Laura’s version did not have nearly the level of success as either Falco’s or After The Fire’s version.
The Definitive Version
So, knowing that there are 3 versions of “Der Kommissar”, which is the definitive version? Which version should I play for my kids, and which version should I ask my favorite DJ to play, the next time I go to an ’80’s club?
Answer: Falco’s version. His version is the definitive version, and neither After The Fire’s version nor Laura Branigan’s version should ever be played without also playing Falco’s version. Doing otherwise would be a travesty……
Lyrics (Falco)
Two, three, four, eins, zwei, drei Es is nichts dabei Wenn ich euch erzaehle die Geschichte Nichts desto trotz, ich bin es schon gewohnt Im tv-funk da laeuft es nicht, jah Sie war so jung, das Herz so rein und weiss Und jede Nacht hat ihren Preis Sie sagt: "Sugar sweet, jah'got me rapp'in to the heat!" Ich verstehe sie heiss Sie sagt: Babe you know, I miss my Funky friends" Sie meint, Jack und Jill Mein funk Verstaendnis reicht zur Not Ich ueberreiss' was sie jetzt will Ich ueberlege bei mir, ihre Nase spricht dafuer Waehrend dessen ich noch rauche Die "special places" sind ihr wohlbekannt Ich meine, sie faehrt ja U-bahn auch dort singen's:
Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh Er wird dich anschauen, und du weisst warum Die Lebenslust bringt dich um
Alles klar Herr Kommissar?
(Hey man, wanna buy some stuff man? Did you ever rap that thing Jack, so rap it to the beat)
Wir treffen Jill und Joe und dessen Bruder hip, Und auch den Rest der koolen gang Sie rappen hin, sie rappen her Dazwischen kratzen's ab die Waend' Dieser Fall ist klar lieber Herr Kommissar Auch wenn sie anderer Meinung sind Den Schnee auf dem wir alle talwaerts fahren Kennt heute jedes Kind Jetzt das Kinderlied
Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh Er hat die Kraft und wir sind klein und dumm Und dieser Frust macht uns stumm
Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh Wenn er dich anspricht und du weisst warum Sag' ihm dein Leben bringt dich um
Alles klar Herr Kommissar?
Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh Er hat die Kraft und wir sind klein und dumm Und dieser Frust macht uns stumm
Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh Wenn er dich anspricht und du weisst warum Sag' ihm dein Leben bringt dich um
Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh Dreh dich nicht um - oh, oh, oh Der Kommissar geht um - oh, oh, oh
This is the classic Lipton Onion Soup Potatoes recipe married to my favorite item to order from IHOP: The Big Steak Omelette! I got the idea to do this last week, when I needed to stretch a dollar and feed myself for a couple of nights. I had a ribeye steak that I wanted to do something different with, and that’s when I came up with the idea of essentially turning it into a breakfast taco.
Ingredients:
1 Envelope Lipton Onion Soup Mix
6-8 medium gold potatoes, cut into medium-bite-sized chunks
1/3 cup olive oil
1 ribeye steak
1/2 shredded cheddar cheese (or your favorite cheddar blend)
1/4 cup Parmesan cheese
4 large eggs
1 tablespoon heavy cream
Kosher salt and pepper to taste
Mild, Medium, or Hot Salsa
Flour Tortillas
This is the classic Lipton Onion Soup Potatoes recipe married to my favorite item to order from IHOP: The Big Steak Omelette! I got the idea to do this last week, when I needed to stretch a dollar and feed myself for a couple of nights. I had a ribeye steak that I wanted to do something different with, and that’s when I came up with the idea of essentially turning it into a breakfast taco.
Instrucciones:
Preheat oven to 425 degrees, Fahrenheit. Grease a 13 X 9-inch roasting pan with butter, shortening, or cooking spray. Give that envelope of Lipton Onion Soup a good shake before opening it, in order to break up any clumps and distribute the ingredients, evenly. Add the potatoes, Lipton Onion Soup Mix, and olive oil. Mix all ingredients in the pan with a spoon or spatula, until all potatoes are coated with the oil and soup mix.
On a cutting board, season the ribeye steak with the kosher salt and pepper, to your liking. Slice the steak into strips, roughly 2 inches in length. Add the steak strips to the potato/oil/soup mixture, distributing them evenly amongst the potatoes.
In a bowl, blender or Magic Bullet, crack the 4 large eggs, add the heavy cream, and then beat the eggs, until fully scrambled. Pour the scrambled egg mixture into the pan with the potatoes and steak. Sprinkle the cheddar and parmesan cheeses evenly on top of the mixture, and then cover the pan with aluminum foil.
Bake in pre-heated oven covered for approximately 1 hour, then remove the aluminum foil, and bake uncovered for an additional 30 minutes. Remove from oven, and allow casserole to cool at least 5-10 minutes before serving. Serve on top of heated tortillas with your favorite salsa.
